My College Crush (Part-2)

On 15^th September, 2006…. We had a function (CREATIVITY 2k6) on an occasion of Engineers’ Day which was arranged by ISTE members and she was also one of them, there I performed in a painting competition and I got 1^st position.

In the end what I saw…

Divya, with an orange suit salwar… coming towards me without any smile; I was just scared “What happened?”

What did I wrong?

As she stands beside me, she smiled…..

Seemed like a dream for me, and she said “Congrats! You got 1^st position”

“Your drawing is too good”

After hearing these words I was just blank like a dumb. This was the first conversation we had….

I said, “Thank you”

I want resume the conversation but I was afraid of something as I was a shy guy at that time.

As she left, my heart was pounding like anything! And I was regretting why I didn’t say something more……

The 3rd semester was approaching and there was a building pressure of a vast syllabus to complete, a future to think of...

The first year batch had just entered our college... I envied their carefree days... They didn't have a decision to make as yet… I came into this field because I didn't get into a medical college and I didn't intend to spend my precious year to attempt it again… Sometimes I wished I had been more patient… Maybe I would have got to live my dream... The years in college passed in jiffy... I now valued the comfort and security of those years... I felt lost in a vast sea of career choices... My friends had been an integral part of my life here... The best ones I made here... Now we were all heading different directions... I often wondered what life would be like after the last semester and as the answer was getting clearer, I dreaded it...

I was sitting with my friends in the canteen, aware of the stares and silent whispers from the first years... They were mostly loud and immature... Always shouting over the top... My classmates were checking out the new girls... Their last attempt at experiencing a college romance... There was none I was interested in... They all seemed the same to me... I was not looking forward to any link ups... The last year I intended to live the most of my carefree time...

It was a Saturday night and I had been with my friend “Sandeep Singh Sohi”.. I went back home and logged on the internet. I opened my facebook accounts... I rarely opened it and when I did I was flooded with notifications, status updates, tags, friends request ( I usually accepted them without even checking who I accepted) and began checking the thing..(I first made myself invisible to avoid all those who jumped on my chat list to chat).

There was a message in my inbox... Divya... The name did ring a bell... I opened her message... read it.

“jai Shree Krishna”

"Hi.. m Divya.. met u in colg if u remember..

I sent her a reply...

"Hi Divya... ofcourse I remember u that’s y I sent u the friend req. (I can't recollect the words to carry on the conversation.)

Immediately I got another message from her.. God!! She was awake at one in the night...

"ok J..but I can't c u online... "

So I went online  ... She was there... Her profile picture was “Radha Krishna ji”...
we started chatting...

Divya: Hi

Me: Hi

Divya: So u come online at this time always?

Me: No, was out today.. came home now so..

Divya: ohh ok.. Where do you stay?

Me: Ludhiana n u?

Divya: Basically I’m from Himachal, but use to stay in Hostel!!

Me: Ohhh I c

Divya: Your name seems you are Bengali…

Me: Yes! I’m ….but I’m brought up in Ludhiana…

Divya: Bhalo! hehehehe

Me: Can u give me your cell number?

Divya: uhhhmmmm naaah! Not now later! You will always find me right here..

Divya: I’ve to go now…. I was getting sleepy... See u in college..

Jai Shree Krishna!

Me: Okay!

My last thought was... Divya! Divya! Divya!

The wait so long...

It had been 3 months since I first chatted to her... When she said "see you in college", I thought she would also make an effort to meet me. But nothing like that happened... We were still strangers... I kept waiting for lunch time to start, then her to leave the classroom for hostel, always hoping she would notice me... It was disheartening to know that I was just a nameless face in the small crowd for her.

I kept texting her.. Sending offliners.. Waiting long hours for her to come online.. Practically all day I was online... I was losing sleep and interest in other things...

By the end of the first month, I knew her timetable by heart... When my classes left early, I waited till her class ended so that I could see her for sometime... I was always longing to see her...

So I decided to find her contact no. And in the end I got her contact no. from one source.

I sent a text on her cell….

Me: “Jai Shree Krishna”

Divya: who’s this?

Me: I said, “ kiran from ludhiana, creativity 2k6, painting.”

Divya: ohhh, how did you get my no.?

Me: I’m sorry! You never use to b online and I was desperate to have a word with you. Even I can’t see you in college. I’m sorry for it.

Divya: J It’s ok! kiran

We exchanged some texts.. However long my questions, she always managed to answer in one word...

One day out of the blue, she texted me...

Divya: Hey kiran, I want to see who you are.. I can’t recall ur face. Let’s meet!

(oh F*ck!)

I texted her back..

Me: Yes, sure...

Next day when she was in front of me….

I couldn't make out what she was thinking... Her eyes didn't give out anything...

I was tongue tied for sometime...

"Hi... hi Divya" Saying out her name itself was thrilling.

She smiled and said," Hi "

Again I was blank and she said, “Bye I have to leave. I have some assignment to do.”

 "Ok.. ok.. Nice meeting you". She gave me a handshake.. She made me nervous... I ran back to my class and kept smiling.. Here I was waiting for her to meet me all these days and when she finally did, I couldn't stand there for more than 2 minutes.. Hopelessly attracted to her I was.. My legs were shaking...

The days that followed were of restlessness.. I would wait at the bus as she use to come to see off her friend.. She always use to give me a cute smile and that was it.. An occasional "hi" and sometimes "bye" that was all she said. It wasn't getting any further.. My self confidence began to slump.. I waited at my window to sometimes see her going hostel.. Se was occupying all my attention and draining my energy...

It was more than 7-8 months still we were not even close to being "good friends". She didn't like me and it was getting apparent. She was sweet and that was probably why she was acting good to me...

I decided that I would give up on her.. It hurt but I didn't want to be perceived as a desperate one.. Yes I wanted her badly but I had to behave with dignity...

I engaged myself with friends...

Slowly the hours on net became less.. I began to get good sleep.. I stopped waiting for her at the bus stop.. Hardly ever came on the window.. My days were now productive.. I even started liking my study course...

I saw her often in the library.. I never went near her.. Sometimes she saw me and smiled and I too smiled back...

The year 2011 was about to end.. I was living my life again... With a new sense of self confidence...

"If it lasts more than 7-8 months, then it isn't called a crush.... It's love... :)"

Was I truly in love with Divya?

One day ISTE members called me to make some poster. There she was…

I knew that story can't finish here......

She come to me and said,” Hi, how are you”?

Me: I’m fine! N u?

And she sat beside me…. And here the conversation begins…

To see what going to b happen????

Wait for next PART….

(To be continued)